Firsts

When you are a parent, "First" means something totally different to you. Every day there is a first, the first bottle, the first dirty diaper, the first bath. It then goes to the first tooth, first day of school, first dance, etc.

This picture is the FIRST time we laid eyes on our new baby boy! This vision is VERY blurry to me, considering I looked at him through extremely wet eyes. If I were to have following photos you would be able to see, the first time I held him, the first kiss I gave him, and most importantly the first time I told him, "I LOVE YOU". Though that wasn't the first time I had said it, I uttered those words multiple times a day since the moment of the match. Yet it was the FIRST time I was able to say it to his tiny face. It was at that moment when I REALIZED that I was going to be the one that witnessed every first this LITTLE MAN was going to experience. I could not have been more honored.

Even though Brian and I left Illinois seconds after we got the call that informed us that our birth mom had gone into labor, we still missed out on the FIRST 22 hours of Daylen's life. And with that we were unable to hear his first cry, to see his first bath, to be the first ones to touch him, to be the first ones to kiss his face, and the most painful, I was unable to be the first one to whisper in his little ear, "I love you." There was a time that I almost cried over these missed firsts, until I realized something VERY important. I will be the one to be next to him for a lifetime full of Firsts, this selfless woman should be the one that was able to have those very few moments of firsts. They are something that NO ONE will be able to take away from her. I pray that she forever cherishes those FIRSTS.

I may not have been the FIRST one to tell my son I love him, but I am VERY o.k. with that simple fact.